With all the walking up hill, down hill, up hill, up hill, up hill—honestly, everything’s uphill—you can work up a sweat. You can also work up a thirst.

Now, you have to keep hydrated, you just do. To keep those mediocre grades, to not (obviously) fall asleep in class, to avoid crazy headaches, to prevent any more of a drained feeling than necessary—keep hydrated.

Water’s your best friend, a dirty secret coffee would hate for you to find out. You could always buy water, but a cafeteria might be out of your way. Besides, who has exact change for the supposedly cold, functioning vending machines? Besides, spending a whole dollar plus for water—what a chick magnet.

Instead, take a quick slurp or two or three at a local water fountain. The best “water fountain” is in fact the new water filling stations throughout UCI for the cleanest, tastiest, free-ist H2O you can get. However, what if you have no container for the filling station? Water fountains, that old elementary school friend of yours, is back to help out again—some have aged well, others not so much and you must avoid these certain watering holes.

Avoid the water fountains in Aldrich Park. When a water fountain has a scenic view, it spells danger—Nature always takes over. Be it mold or creepy crawlies, bending over for a drink of water feels vulnerable enough. One time, a giant half drowning spider was found in a scenic, “fresh” water fountain—this writer speaks from experience.

Sadly, the best water fountains are not perfect for germaphobes—the best well kept water fountains are actually in high foot traffic areas, such as right outside a classroom in a building. My personal favorite would have to be the water fountains at the ARC. You know, the ones in the bathroom/locker room. They are by far the chillest ones on Campus. Man up, and slurp.